Dear precious children,
Guess what!!! I was NOT put on this earth to run around all freakin day taking care of everyfreakinlittlething you may need or want! I am ALLOWED to take a piss ALL BY MYSELF!!! I PROMISE you the world will not end!! If I am in the shower I don't care what is going on I WANT TO BE LEFT ALONE! You may come get me if and only if all three of you are on fire at the same time and nobody can put each other out! If only one of you burst into flames the fire extinguisher is under the kitchen sink where it always is. No I will not get you a cup of milk when I'm in the shower and no I will NOT peel you an orange when I'm trying to take a dump. I could care less if your peas touched your mac and cheese and your ice cube melted and now it's to tiny to see. NO I will NOT get up from the table where I just sat down to eat my cold meal because I've been running around the kitchen getting you more milk, salt, butter, pepper, paper towel and a new fork because you dropped yours AGAIN.
And for the love of GOD, how many times do I have to say "we only color on PAPER" !!!
Love
Mom
Dear Hubby
Don't touch me.
Love
Me
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1 comment:
LOL!! I have written several letters like this. And will be writing many more in the coming years I'm sure!
Put them to bed, pour a stiff drink, go into your bathroom, light only 1 or 2 candles and take the hottest bath you can stand.
Do.not.get.out. for at least 30 minutes. :D
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